"It doesn't matter how many new hair cuts you get

... or gyms you join, or how many glasses of chardonnay you drink with your girlfriends... you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong or how you could have misunderstood. and how in the hell for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy. And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he'll see the light and show up at your door. And after all that, however long all that may be, you'll go somewhere new. and you'll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again. And little pieces of your soul will finally come back. And all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade."

I am semi-getting things back together. I have a car (FINALLY!!), I worked out the other day with Calie, I'm cleaning my room hardcore, and I'm budgetting my money like what what. Buuuuut, I don't have like any money so for the next couple of weeks I'm going to be a little tight but I'll get it together, I always do.

and I chopped off my hair, and I look extra sexy.



Stay fresh.

Grayer than where sea meets sky

Early in the morning while the tide was still low
and the sky was so gray, you couldn’t see the sunrise,
I sat on the rock wall and waited for you.

The fog rose with the tide as the sun stretched
in the sky (though she hid behind a blanket of clouds),
My feet swinging off the rock wall as I waited for you.

Ships docked to the bleakest sunset,
I watched the sailors walk to their homes
and on the rock wall I waited for you.

One sailor stopped, he told me…..

Words trip over tongues when they come out of mouths
and eyes look sad as the words pour out-
but I would know if I lost my heart out at sea,
how else would I hear you ask wait for me?